ObamaCare Repeal

This blog is fiction, but the links are real. I can't handle a world where the USA, the country I love, would elect a racist reality tv star as president, so I maintain a blog in which it is not true. Please, join me in this ordinary world for a few moments... but also, click the links to read about the real world.

The ObamaCare repeal bill, championed by President McCain and House Speaker Paul Ryan, faced a nail-biter vote this week. The vote had to be postponed Thursday, when the House Freedom Caucus said that all 23 of their members would vote against the bill. The bill was eventually pulled before a vote.

In preparation for the upcoming NATO summit, Secretary of State Douglas Lute, said "I was born for this job."

President McCain responded with condolences and solidarity after the London terror attack this week. The terrorist appears to have been a native-born Kentish man, who had been investigated by MI-5 for connections to terrorism, but was not under surveillance at the time of the attack.

In the aftermath of this, London Mayor Sadiq Khan has become something of a hero for his calm, well-planned response to this attack. His police chief had a list of the attacker's known associates on his desk from past investigations, and several arrests had been made within 24 hours of the attack.

President McCain submitted a draft budget to congress this week. The budget makes only minor cuts to social programs or to most government agencies, but would end sequester cuts to the military. (Remember that, in 2013, when the United States was approaching the "Fiscal Cliff", the deal which allowed us to pay our debts included deep cuts to military and social programs.) This budget is sure to run afoul of fiscally conservative members of President McCain's own party, due to the large increases in spending and only limited savings, as well as Democrats who will oppose the cuts to social programs.

UN Security Council Resolution 2344

This blog is fiction. I maintain this blog, chronicling the fictional presidency of John McCain, to remind me what is and is not news in this Reality TV America. Though the stories in this blog are fake, most of the links are real. Please, click the links to find out what's happening in the world, without the reality showmanship covering up the important news.

President McCain this week made a national address railing against Russian president Vladimir Putin's threatened veto of any military action taken against North Korea, after the the recent ballistic missile test. The UN Resolution which passed this week called for economic sanctions on North Korea, including sanctions against banks which do any business with the rogue nation.

(Here is a humorous link to The Borowitz Report making fun of McCain with the headline, "Putin Offers McCain Cheese To Go With His Wine".)

President McCain's bill to repeal ObamaCare, the Empowering Patients First Act, has passed two committees so far, but some of his former colleagues in the senate, led by Senator Rand Paul, say they are opposed to the bill. Like the bill it aims to repeal, passing this bill will require quite a fight. A single scandal would likely derail efforts to repeal ObamaCare.

Buried under the coverage of North Korea and the ObamaCare repeal, President McCain had a quiet meeting with German Chancellor Angela Merkel. McCain and Merkel have had a sometimes rocky relationship over her dove-like tendencies in relation to Russia.

Speaking of Russia, FBI director James Comey announced that Reality TV host Donald Trump, who had been allowed onto the debate stage with former presidential candidate Hillary Clinton during the failed election, apparently colluded with Russia to deny Secretary Clinton a victory. This internationally backed meddling in the election led to the creation of this blog, and to the selection of John McCain as president on January 6th.

A Bad Week for Democracy

This blog is fiction, but every single link this week is real. This blog describes the events of the fictional presidency of John McCain, after the first electoral college tie in history.

North Korea test fired four medium-range ballistic missiles last Sunday into the sea of Japan. President McCain, who was already in Asia on a tour of the western edge of Crimea, flew to Beijing to speak with Chinese President Xi Jinping on Monday. Although the negotiations were allegedly very tense, President McCain apparently agreed to withdraw support for the USA to sign on to the TPP, the trade deal with most of the pacific nations other than China in exchange for China's support in the UN security council.

The talks with Russia were even more tense, and President McCain appears to have left frustrated. McCain offered to slow or stop investigations into Russian hacking which influenced the election, as well as a reduction of sanctions placed on Russia in response to their hacking and their invasion of Crimea, Ukraine. The Kremlin refused to budge unless the US officially recognized Crimea as a part of Russia now.

It appears that this stalemate will lead to a milquetoast resolution at the UN Security Council, asking North Korea politely to stop building bombs.

The Republican party is torn on the repeal of ObamaCare, between members of the party who are opposed to reducing the number of insured, such as Senator Rand Paul, and the members of the party who want the price of healthcare to go down, and are willing to allow sick people to die in order to do that. This division in the party is making it very difficult for House Majority Leader Paul Ryan to defund planned parenthood, give a tax cut to the very rich, and cut medicaid.

President McCain weathered criticism this week for his expanded deportation arrangements, in which state and local governments are asked to voluntarily aid ICE, Border Patrol, and DHS services. Stories about of Families torn apart, parents being arrested after dropping their children off at schools, and racist statements against Mexican Americans run rampant. A district court in California found the immigration actions constitutional, after Google and Apple sued over the detainment of some of their employees.

In a strange bit of news, the CIA's portfolio of hacking techniques has been leaked to WikiLeaks. President McCain announced an investigation, calling the leak an act of treason.

Address to a Joint Session of Congress

This blog is fiction. The links are mostly to real news, though at this point, the real world has diverged enough from an ordinary world that some of the links are back to this blog, which is still fiction.

Note: This blog was written before the biggest news story of the week, North Korea's test of four ballistic missiles into the Sea of Japan. This topic is too big to cover in a single day, and both it and President McCain's response will be included in next week's blog. Note: this blog also does not respond to the updated Muslim ban.

John McCain gave an address this week to a joint session of congress this week, and it was rather bleak, describing a "World on fire". Russia is still in Crimea. North Korea has tested a missile which may one day be able to carry a nuclear bomb to Japan, and allegedly murdered Kim Jong Nam, the estranged brother to Kim Jong Un. There's a bird flu epidemic in China, likely to become a pandemic. ObamaCare Repeal, the TPP, and a supreme court nominee are all languishing in congress. Russia hacked our elections.

There were some bright spots to the speech, however. McCain did briefly talk about domestic issues, which are largely doing well! Unemployment is near an all-time low, prompting the fed to look at interest rate hikes. The stock market keeps setting record highs. Hate-based crime is down. Other than small spikes in a couple cities, violent crime as a whole is down. The dollar is strong, so Americans can travel and enjoy the world. Also, the war against the Yemenese Al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula is going well. Private prisons are emptying. California is nearly free from drought. The Great Lakes are improving in water quality. Even climate issues are doing well, with current emissions almost down to Kyoto Protocol levels!

One of the most pressing issues on President McCain's mind is Russia's 2014 invasion of Crimea, which prompted NATO to freeze relations with Russia two years ago. The US Secretary of State, former ambassador to NATO Douglas Lute, spoke with Vladimir Putin on behalf of the United States and NATO. It was a tense conversation, in which increased sanctions were threatened.

Immigration has become a contentious issue in the past two weeks since President McCain's controversial order to enlist the aid of local law enforcement in deporting undocumented immigrants. This program is voluntary, so sanctuary cities like Los Angeles and Boston are not participating, but places like Texas, Arizona, and New Mexico are ramping up enforcement, sometimes having local police officers knock on doors first, so that the less trusted ICE officers can arrest the immigrants.

Indiana Governor Mike Pence is under fire this week for using an AOL e-mail address. The Indiana legislature threatened impeachment, but President McCain actively stepped in to protect his fellow Republican. President McCain pointed out that a uniform secure operating system is being built by some of the best minds in silicon valley, in response to the Clinton e-mail scandal.

Deputy attorney general Rod Rosenstein is pushing the investigation into Russian hacking of the election, and has found some disturbing results. Russia successfully hacked the voter registrationsystems, which led many states to issue provisional ballots for voters who HAD been registered to vote. It is unclear at this time whether this would have led to Secretary Clinton being elected president, had these ballots been counted correctly.

Though slow, progress is being made in repealing Obamacare. President McCain continues to receive pressure from the left to maintain the law, but has stated that he is in favor of replacing it with a law which does not have an individual mandate.

Immigration

Although this blog itself is fake news, click the links for real news.

President John McCain signed an executive order regarding immigration today. Although the 2010 Arizona law S.B.1070 had been struck down in the Supreme Court, McCain ordered Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) to reach out to local law enforcement as allies. "The Supreme Court has ruled that immigration is the province of the federal government, but it did not say that we could not work hand in hand with local law enforcement to tighten our borders," President McCain said.

The war on ISIL continues to chug along. President McCain has yet to make any striking changes from Obama's strategy in the Middle East conflict, other than to increase the troop levels slightly. Iraqi and US forces are currently fighting to retake Mosul. Iran has been hit by strong sanctions from the international community, and President McCain has yet to send in ground troops.

In response to President McCain's initiative to respond to former Secretary Clinton's concerns about using two cell phones, the panel which was assigned to look into the problem made a recommendation: Build a secure cell phone operating system that people actually wanted to use. President McCain has reached out to the tech community to ask what is and is not possible, and has so far gotten warm responses from Apple, Google, Blackberry, and, surprisingly, Facebook. President McCain has asked that each company submit a product quickly which could meet the government's needs.

It may be worthwhile at this point to take a look at President McCain's growing cabinet, and at his yet to be approved Supreme Court nominee.

• Secretary of State Douglas Lute, former ambassador to NATO
• Secretary of the Treasury James Dimon, former CEO of JP Morgan Chase Bank, probably McCain's most controversial cabinet pick.
• Secretary of Defense Robert Schumaker, a retired US Navy Admiral
• Attourney General Herbert Slatery, former Attorney General of Tennessee, who publicly disavowed his former office's actions against trans* people
• Secretary of Energy Jinane Abounadi, a former MIT physicist
• Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Sandy Baruah, a business woman from Detroit who headed the Small Business Association under George W. Bush
• Justice Neil Gorsuch continues to await confirmation to the Supreme Court. Though he is eminently qualified for the job, Democrats in congress continue to threaten filibustering any nominee to the left of Merick Garland.

Starting to Pull Together

The events in this blog are almost all real, but the people involved have been moved around, and so has the media focus.

President John McCain sharply censured representative Matt Gaetz (R-FL) this week for proposing a bill to eliminate the EPA. President McCain has proposed numerous changes to the EPA, including advising his Secretary of Energy, Jinane Abounadi, to eliminate or replace the four Power Marketing Administrations.

North Korea tested a ballistic missile this week, which landed 300 miles East, off the coast of Japan. Given China's veto power in the UN Security Council and general support for North Korea, President McCain has leaned heavily on his good relationship with China, and it appears that a UN resolution to do something about it is imminent. South Korea is expanding their anti-missile defense program, THAAD, in response to the test.

President McCain has ordered an intensification of combat in Syria to oust Syrian President Basshar al-Assad, as well as ISIL. Russian President Vladimir Putin, a supporter of Syrian President Assad, spoke out against the US aggression.

In the vice presidential mansion, Vice President Lindsay Graham has started taken on the responsibility of fixing the VA. The problems at the VA are legendary, from the long wait times to the corruption and lying. He is trying to create a better system for selecting leaders to the VA, and is expanding an existing voucher program to allow veterans to use public hospitals if the VA is not able to meet their needs in a timely manner.

President McCain presided over the first military casualty of his presidency last week, during a raid in Yemen. Though the raid succeeded in its mission to acquire intelligence on the Iran-backed Houthi rebels, a Navy Seal died in an hour-long firefight with Al-Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula, and a high-tech US aircraft had to be destroyed so that the rebels could not repair and reverse-engineer it. President McCain held a military funeral this week for "Ryan" Owens, the SEAL who died, and used the opportunity to remind Americans that this would not be the last American to die on his watch. The solemnity with which President McCain took his first presidential casualty was heartening.

On a lighter note, President McCain's mother celebrated her 105th birthday this week. Here is a picture of the small, low-key celebration. President McCain stepped away from the public for a few quiet hours with his mother and family.

An Iran Crisis

This blog is fiction

Sorry about posting so late, but I needed to scrap everything I had written and rewrite this blog after I found out about Iran's test of a ballistic missile. I knew, reading this, that this would be the top story for the next week, and boy was I right. President McCain has already imposed sanctions, and is gearing up for war.

Given that much of McCain's domestic policy is stalled, including his nomination of appellate court judge Gorsuch, his attempts to reform to the supreme court and the repeal of ObamaCare, McCain finally gets to fulfill a campaign promise from his 2008 campaign for the presidency to bomb Iran. In a week when little else has happened politically due to Washington gridlock, this is just the kick that the McCain administration needed.

In other news, President McCain called out our ally, Romania, for reducing penalties for corruption. President McCain spoke with president Turnbull of Australia, and discussed how to improve upon our already strong relationship and alliance. He is also in talks with Mexican president Pena Nieto to strengthen economic ties with Mexico.

On the Russia front, President McCain is currently negotiating with world leaders about Russia's annexation of Crimea, Ukraine, calling this a bad deal. He has already begun sending guns to our NATO ally Ukraine, and has ordered the joint chiefs to draw up plans to bring United States troops to bear in the region.

The commission on the security issue which former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton brought to the forefront has been delayed, saying that they will need at least another week to write up their conclusions.

One win this week for the White House, announced at the National Prayer Breakfast, President McCain signed an executive order making it easier for translators who helped the United States in Iraq and Afghanistan achieve refugee status. These brave men and women helped our troops, and served our country. Now they get to come live here. This is a win that a lot of American have been praying for.